Wednesday, March 08, 2006

International Women's Day - Ssssmokin'!

Just got back from a totally glitterati-infested, high profile social do - the Swarovski- Satya Paul Fashion Show at the Hyatt. I'm like, sooooo in da crowd. or wodeva. Of course, unsociable that I am, had to be dragged kicking and screaming from my comfortable bed to the car by mom. Don't regret it, though. Free booze, chicken teriyaki and lamb satay, and the most unutterably delectable chocolates in the whole world - soul food for the carrot-dipping who's who. Truffle to tiramisu to strawberries and cherries the size of eggs.
Bumped into an old school friend, Brandy. The satay wasn't half bad, but couldn't eat much, because B wouldn't eat anything. So politely stayed away from much food [i.e., post the mandatory 2 helpings] and drank vodka and orange juice. Of course, she doesn't drink either - I don't know what these women live on, I tell ya. Yennyway, I've got to really stop drinking - doesn't agree with my medicines, as the gynaec had indeed warned me it wouldn't. Three drinks do not a headache make. Not with me, at least, really. But now I have a terrible one. I'm not going to drink anymore, honest.
Oh, of course, the clothes were nice. Very nice, in fact, some of them. I liked the white ones - or peachy cream, or whatchamacallit. No, I don't know what they were called - other than sarees and salwar-kurtas with crystals and lace. Oh, they're called ensemble, I think. [That doesn't sound right, there must be more to it]. All the top models were there - Shyla Lopez has lost gazillions of weight, Noyonika was looking tres jolie, Model Tina [which I believe, is her full name, after an affidavit] canNOT catwalk to save her ribcage. She stoops, and does a complicated futuristic dance-type thing, something between Quasimodo trying to be a geisha[?!] and an aged camel in stilletoes, only flashier - very difficult to explain on a headache. Maybe that's what caused it, come to think of it. Tapur/Tupur - at least one of em was there.
Let's see, what else. The famous persons of Kolkata were all present- theatre personality, TV anchor, Govt. hotshot, that socialite from the club who looks like a christmas tree all year round was in full bloom [to her credit, the woman has a gorgeous bod - I mean she must be 97, but what a body and what skin!].
They played one or two songs that I liked - Besame Mucho was one, the other one was a french song that I haven't heard before.
On the way back, an inebriated mother [lady can't hold her drink, what to say - she gulps, she refuses to sip] exhibited some motor madness, singing "sesame kucho" every time she overtook a lorry from the wrong side and narrowly missed death. She insists the song is "sesame kucho", I haven't bothered to correct her - there's an unmistakable joie de vivre in the way she sings it awl wrong in a drunken stupor. Try telling my mother drunk driving is against the law and have your head bitten off, won't you?


No kidding, I really have. My unborn kids had better be bloody grateful, I tell you.

p.s.: Fellow JU bloggers, please please support me during this trying time. if you find me with a cigarette please feel free to take it from me and stub it out. I may fight, I may scratch and bite, but please do this for me. I wanna give this a serious shot, this time. I give u license to slap.


Dipanjan Das said...

congratulessun. i have done it and have restrained myself more than three months now. after 4 whole years of smoking 1 pack of soots everyday. you can do it too.

Casablanca said...

Permission to slap?

Good luck then, with quitting. Wouldnt want you to get slapped :)

nothing said...

something between Quasimodo trying to be a geisha[?!] and an aged camel in stilletoes, only flashier
ROTFLMAO, though I have never seen the person in question.

Teleute said...

And did any single one of those silly catwalking women hold a candle up to me?

thalassa_mikra said...

Quit, quit!! It'll do wonders for your skin I tell ya.

"carrot-dipping"! Hahahaha! So you're telling me all the Bong mashima socialites and Marwari housewives are on a diet?

I'm just really amused at the idea of your mom actually singing "Besame Mucho" (you know what it means, right?)

Spin said...

I drink half a glass of fruit punch and look at me, killer headache.

Poorna Banerjee said...

Chocolates and Teriyaki and glitzy swarovski nightlife....


How Come I NEVER (note the Not eveR bit) get to be in these places?????

Fellow JUDEian, its your humblest duty to bring your fellow bloggers to gala events such as this for intellectual purposes.

And take a big plastic packet with you so that you can bag some of those unutterably delightfool chocolates. D'you hear??

rainbeau_peep said...

thank u. i hope i can. i started early ... lol, damn early ... so it's difficult to let go, but i'm doing ok. it's high time i quit, actually.

i doubt i'd be slapped, u know. i'm heavier than pretty much all the JU bloggers - they wouldn't dare!

she isn't very watchworthy, unless u want to gape. she's a good gape-ee.

why? why must u put me through unbearable agony by asking such queschuns? why i ask! do u want me to sing u a westlife song about how u light up my life, don't fill me with strife, oh lard it cuts like a knife?

oh u have no idea, Dolon kakima has become Dolly aunty, and yes, she's shunned the chitol maach er jhaal, because the GM diet won't allow it. :-[
Oh, yea, 'besame mucho' means kiss me plenny, don't it? What's absurd is, friends who've been reading my blog have got into the habit of sms-ing me in the middle of the night, quoting the song. irksome, i tell u.

i could tell u that things like fruit punch and bacardi breezer are a sinful waste of good alcohol, but i won't. becoz i can't have anything now. and that hurts.

the demandments of the peepilz! ki volvo.

nothing said...

posht,posht. and how cometh pieshe of monologue?

Unknown said...

great job! almost got hooked onto ciggies not so long ago... but I've managed to stay off them... well, most of the time... now I'm just a 'social smoker'... darn, that sounds a bit sad...

anywayz... it isn't always daytime here in Holland... I think you meant Greenland :-) ... which is further up north...

love reading your blog...


Black Jedi said...

Guess who's back. Only for some time, then I will put it back into hibernation. Do you like Jekyll or Hibe?

Ron said...

how goes the smokeless existence? where have you vanished btw??

rainbeau_peep said...

shtill dyanshar,
pieshe op monologue cometh not at all. it falleth to pieshes. i do not mail u for suggestions, becoj an average day finds me mumbling my lines everywhere- in the corridor, at the canteen, in the loo - and consequently concerned individuals have offered me plenty of free and very confusing adbhaij as to how i should go about it. i bhill not takes no more adbhaij, nuff ij nuff!

a 'social smoker'? ur superhuman then - i can either stay away from them entirely, or i smoke like a house on fire - nothing in between works. not that not smoking works either - i feel pretty sick of life. :-[
oh, and, geography exams are a childhood trauma i haven't as yet been able to rid myself of - but, tell me, isn't it daylight till about 8/9 at night, in amsterdam?

on my blog, i like u medium rare.

existence is but a drag.. and it hurts that it ain't a drag from a cigarette! :-[ I will make a comeback shortly - just a loadful of things going on - nothing particularly interesting.

mojo said...

if u succeed staying off for more than three months...tahole didibhai ekti bar colleger corridor e dekha koria ei juniortike payer dhulo diya dhonyo koriben!

nothing said... keepsh hearing gushing encomiumsh in praishe or your theshpian shkillsh, and henshe one doubtsh sham chacha hash you in hish malevolent shpell. one shurmishes you have got the e-mail id from the little one? in cashe you haven't, it ish being arka(dot)01(at)gmail(dot)com. mail in. non-advishe guranteed.

Anonymous said...

hi, looked for your email id all over, nirupay hoye ekhane comment mara. we publish a literary magazine called 'quirk'- do consider writing for us ( love the blog...

Unknown said...

Congrats on the quitting! if you need any motivation, i'll come and tell you bloodcurdling stories about chemotherapy :) :) :)